God in Motion

If I were to go to a church today and heard a sermon about some supernatural occurrence, I almost wouldn't blink. Think about the things we believe almost without question...
Jesus walked across the water, defying the laws of gravity? I'll buy that.
Jesus made the dead come back to life? Sure, why not.
God divided the waters of the Red Sea and held a pursuing army at bay long enough for several hundred thousand people to walk across? I don't see why not.
God spoke through his word to predict events that we now see as historical fact? He's God! As if I doubt that.
At the word of Elijah, God withheld rain from the land for a period of years and as if by magic provided him and a widow's family with an unlimited supply of flour and oil? No problem.
Jesus was betrayed, tried , crucified, he died, was buried and then resurrected, bringing all who believe in him the gift of everlasting life? I serve a God who can do anything.

I'm not saying that these things aren't trustworthy and beyond belief. However, I think I need to examine what I mean when I say believe. I believe the accounts given to me in the Bible. I believe that one God rules over all of those events and is alive today. If it's so easy for me to believe that God has done all of those things, why is it so hard to trust God with the activities of my life today? I don't know why I gravitate toward a static God. Maybe the certainty and finality of all the things He has done makes me more comfortable. I really don't know, but I seem content to settle for a God that is powerful yet almost stationary. The fact is that God is alive and well and active on my behalf. Once the dust settles, I see where God's hand was at work and I rejoice at His faithfulness. Where was all of the faith when God was in motion? God has never given me a reason to do anything but trust him and the minute uncertainty comes, I crumble into a heap of "what if"s and "where is God"s. I need to trade in my static god for the God in motion, the God who is at work even in my failings.

Symphony

Over the last several weeks, I've had some opportunities to be around different groups of people. The biggest events were the church build in South Dakota and being a counselor at youth camp. What really struck me was the wide range of people in both of these settings. What was even more noticeable was that the differences didn't seem to matter. Both events needed to accomplish a goal and in both places some of the people were experts in accomplishing our goal. In SD we had some carpenters and professional builders, but not everybody was. In fact, most people weren't. At camp there were people who work with kids for a living and a lot of people who don't. What was most impressive to me was how it all fit together.
We're using words like "community" and "unity" in church settings a lot lately, but I'm coming to understand unity differently than I did before. To be unified is not to have everybody doing the same thing, it is to have everyone moving toward a common goal. Singing in unison doesn't sound bad. It is, without a doubt, unified. But there is a dimension that we're missing out on. When a choir sings, there are a variety of different notes being sung by a various voices, but all of those notes and voices fit into the greater unity of a song. Let's face it, it's just better. It's not more unified, but the unity is broader than unison.
You wouldn't necessarily think that some carpenters, a couple of schoolteachers, a body shop guy, a truck driver, a mechanic, a pharmacist, an electrician, some retirees and some other odds and ends would be a work crew to build a church. But is was a thing of beauty to watch God take all of those various parts and weave them together into a unit. But God didn't gift all of us non-builders with a supernatural dose of carpentry skills right before we started. I was still a schoolteacher who didn't know a whole lot about building anything. But when it was over, I felt that I had been valuable to the overall purpose. Not invaluable, but someone who took part and helped bring the purpose to pass. There were even a couple of times that not being a carpenter was helpful. My questions were different and my perspective was different simply because I wasn't a carpenter. If God had turned me into a carpenter right before it started, I wouldn't have had that perspective and been able to do what I did. I had a role to play in the bigger scheme.
This is the same for all of us. God is orchestrating a symphony among his people. My goal is not to make the symphony happen, my purpose is to pick up my instrument and play. No matter how beautifully I play, it is no match for the sound of the symphony. In John 17:23, Jesus prays for us and lets us in on the purpose of the symphony: "May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them". When we join together and all play our parts, when we let our different notes and instruments blend together, the world around us gets a glimpse of Jesus and the love of our Father. With that in mind, let's make some music.

More Identity Crisis

I have been listening and studying for a bit on this idea of identity. Specifically, what is our identity in Christ. I've come across a few things that have been a real revelation for me...
First, my identity is fixed. Circumstances cannot change even the smallest part of my identity. I heard it this way - "My identity is not determined by my activity." That is a powerful statement. I am who God says I am because he says that's who I am. God didn't whip up a fake ID and give me a disguise to trick Satan like they do in the movies when they are on the run. Through the death and resurrection of His son, God has established who I am and it cannot be undone by anyone or anything around me.
Second, I don't act on who I am. My actions reveal who I think I am. The Bible tells me that I am the righteousness of God. God said it to make it true. The reason it isn't more evident is that I forget or don't really believe it's true. God isn't dishonest, I'm forgetful. Even in my lack of faith, God speaks into my life, trying to shape me and remind me of who I really am.
Finally, God is our father. That sounds pretty vanilla, but it's profound when we understand what that really means. Think about how we view our own children. We beam with pride and joy when they make any kind of progress. We push them on to help them grow, but rejoice at every step. If my 9 yr old son kept crawling around the house, I'd be a little disappointed because he could do more. Let's be honest - I'm better than him at everything. He's 9, so I'm faster, stronger smarter, everything. But he's my son. He doesn't have to impress me to be my son. He doesn't have to wow me for me to be proud.
In the same way, we're God's children. We get a view of how He feels about his children when we see how he treated His son at his baptism. God spoke from heaven "this is my son, who I love. I'm pleased with him." At first, we think of course he's proud of him. It's Jesus. But think for a minute...what had Jesus done at this point? He hadn't performed a single miracle, hadn't preached a sermon, hadn't done any of the Jesus stuff. He'd been a carpenter that was obedient to his Father. That was enough for God to split the sky and announce that He loved him and was proud of him. God isn't waiting for me to cure cancer to be proud of me. He's not reserving judgement until I preach a sermon or heal the sick. He's not waiting for some event. He's proud of me and my next step and eager with anticipation for the one after that.

Identity Crisis

Too often, we spend so much time focused on doing the right thing or not doing the wrong thing. I'm not saying it isn't valuable to consider this. I think that we constantly need to evaluate our actions and consider our motives. It seems, though, that it's easy to get bogged down in a list of do's and don'ts and forget one of the most basic things.

According to Ephesians 2, I was dead. My sin and disobedience was a death sentence. I was an object of God's wrath. There is no hope for me until verse 4. "But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions" This is the big deal. God made us over again. I was dead because of who I was, but now I am alive. I have been reborn. I am new again. I'm not an updated version of the old me. God in his mercy brought me to life. Now I can say that I'm not who I used to be.

This is the important distinction. I think I spend far to much time stressed about my sinful nature. That sounds like I'm going against what I've been taught, but I think it's true because my nature is that I am a child of God. I don't need to wait for certain things to happen. I am who I am. No event will make my status as a child in God's family more or less true. Instead of wondering about what my nature is, I should be living out who I am. I'm not saying that Christians never make mistakes. I think as long as I'm alive there will be some things that nag me and cause me to struggle. But even in those moments, the core of who I am is unchanged. God didn't update me - he made me new. He didn't improve my sinful nature to make it better. He got rid of who I was and made me who I am. The debate now is how to make my new nature come out. Not discovering who I am and can be, but acting like who I already am.

I didn't have to wait for something to happen with my son to become a father. The moment he was born, my identity changed. I was a father. I didn't have to wait for him to say "daddy" or play baseball or ask a girl out on a date. If he never speaks a word, I'm a father. No action or inaction can change this part of who I am. I am a father. And being a father changed my actions. Once I grabbed hold of my new nature, I became different. I didn't have to be instructed in how to want to protect and care for my son. The same holds true for me on the inside. Once I grab hold of my new nature, I am free. Jesus paid the price for my freedom and it can never be taken from me. No amount of opposition from any source will change this. I am free because of what I am becoming and what I have become. I'm not in God's family because of the do's and don'ts. All of the rule keeping in the world won't save me. I'm going to keep them though. Not for the sake of the rules, but because of who I am.

A Lighter Load

I wonder how often I carry a load that is too heavy for me to bear. I also wonder how often someone around me carries a load that is too heavy for them to bear. I think I like the idea of a Christian community. It sounds like it's such a great idea - the way we share, we help and we bear each others burdens. I guess the real question is this: if it sounds so great, why isn't it happening? More to the point, why isn't it happening around me? I think it's because I like the idea of a Christian community. Once it gets past the concept, it gets a little rough around the edges. That's because, if we tell the truth, we're all a little rough around the edges. It takes work to smooth those rough edges out. Sometimes we'll put in the work to smooth them out and while we're working those edges cut us a little.
It's probably time to stop blaming society (my favorite nemesis) and stop looking around for excuses. If I'm carrying too much, whose fault is that? I'm carrying it, so it has to be mine. It doesn't have to be that way, but I choose that path over and over. If I would be honest and admit I need help, I know that I'm surrounded with people that would carry it with me. By the same token, I have to wonder why I'm not bearing anyone else's burdens. There are two explanations. The first is that I'm not making myself available to the people around me and the other is that the people around me don't see me as a burden bearer. This isn't intended to be a "woe is me" kind of post. This is more therapy. I need to put into words that I'm not being the man that God has called me to be.
God didn't send his Son to walk among us so that we could spend our lives isolated and insulated. I spend far too much time as a spirtual thermos. A thermos is great at what it does - it makes sure that whatever is on the inside doesn't affect and is unaffected by what is on the outside. Often I take what God has given me and keep it sealed up, preserved from everyone around me. Other times, I keep myself sealed away from what is around me. Jesus wasn't a thermos. Whatever was in came out. And time and again we see Jesus moved with a range of emotions be everything around him. He was compassionate, kind and forgiving. But at the same time he was uncompromising. He was continually filling himself with the words of His Father and turning around to pour them out all around him.
It's time to take the lid off. Will it make a mess? Probably. Will it be worth it? Definitely.

Holiness

In Leviticus 11, God is giving instructions for clean and unclean food. In verse 44, God sums everything up..."consecrate yourselves and be holy, for I am holy."
As Christians, we like to-do lists. It makes everything clear and easy to define. What God says is slightly different than what we want it to say. After giving a big list of what is and isn't clean, the next part doesn't say that this will make you holy. In essence, it is telling his people how to consecrate themselves so that they can be on their way to holiness. God gives two different commands, not different versions of the same command. The first step is to be consecrated, to set ourselves apart, to remove the things that keep us from him. Only then can we begin to become holy. Holy isn't something to do, it's something to be. It's much easier to do something that to be something. To do something just means I have to put forth some effort. To be something requires that I change who I am.
That doesn't mean that our Christian walk should be marked by inactivity since we're so busy "being" holy. There are two separate things here and we need to be careful to tend to both. Just as inactive holiness is useless, so is activity that isn't marked by holiness. Our activities do not make us holy, or else God would have told the Israelites to do those things and they would have achieved holiness. At the same time, God gave them instructions anyway. If holiness isn't something that can be "done", then what's with the list? He was showing them the necessary steps to prepare themselves.
Just as holiness isn't something that we can do, we can never reach that place without a cost. I keep hearing this idea over and over in different places and different formats. In a very real sense, my salvation is a free gift. But that doesn't mean that it is without cost. To be holy demands that a price be paid. If I am not becoming holy, I am ignoring God's explicit instruction. If I am one of his children, then verse 44 applies directly to me. I am mandated to consecrate myself so that I can become holy. Why should I consecrate myself? Because it is the path to holiness, a necessary path to take. Why should I become holy? Because my Father is and he wants me to be more like him.

Who is the Prodigal?

This past week, I was asked to sing in a church service. The song that I ended up singing was called "Come As You Are". In it, the song refers to "prodigal daughters and sons". This isn't a revolutionary idea to put into a song, and it's a pretty familiar passage of Scripture so it wasn't a groundbreaking song. I spent the longest time misunderstanding something, though. I always thought that prodigal meant lost or wayward. It turns out that prodigal means something completely different. It actually means wasteful. I know that the Bible never actually uses the word prodigal, but it's worth noting because this word is tied closely to the parable of the lost son.
I've known what that word meant for quite some time, but as I was singing this song one morning to get ready God connected the dots in my brain in a way that I never had before. The fact is I had all of the information and was either unwilling or unable to put it all together. I always viewed this song as a call for sinners to come to repentance. I never applied this song to me. That's because I missed an important element of the lost son parable. I tend to focus on the aspect of the son being lost so much that I fail to apply it to my own life on a regular basis. At some level I understand and accept that my sin put me in a far country and that only the grace of God has allowed me to come home. But that's history - I mean, God had redeemed me and called me his own. I'm clearly not the prodigal son that this parable speaks about. Because of that, I quit listening to what the story (and the song) was speaking to me.
As I was driving in the car, God broke me. I understood what was being said to me. The son wasn't called prodigal because he went to a far country. He was prodigal simply for leaving the Father's house. The far country wasn't the problem. The problem was the son's reckless use of what was given to him by his father. I like to say things like "I haven't been a very good steward" because it minimizes and softens what I'm really doing. The plain truth is that I have been wasteful. God has poured into me and I have, in many cases, let it spill onto the floor. How many wasted blessings litter my life? Blessings God intended for my good, for my deliverance. There are too many to count. It's an embarrassment just to consider it.
Still, I serve a faithful God. In spite of my prodigal status, my Father still runs to me when I return home. Not for a moment have I deserved to be called his son. But that doesn't matter one bit. My standing in his family is unmerited. Because I didn't earn it, nobody can point out to the Father why I shouldn't have it. My membership in the family is based entirely on my Father's decision to adopt me. I'm in his family simply because he says I am. There is no depth I will find that will disqualify me. "How great is the love the father has lavished upon us, that we should be called sons of God" I love that word "lavished". In spite of all I've done, my Father's arms are open wide to me. His love for me is unmeasurable. It defies description or understanding.
And I love it.
This prodigal son has a prodigal father.

What It's All About

      For the last several weeks, I have kept coming back to the same thing over and over again.  Two things have really spurred me to keep looking at it.  The first is that I have been studying the Sermon on the Mount for the last several weeks.  Nothing fancy, just reading it over and over and soaking it up.  I'll say this up front - it's a tough word to hear sometimes.  Matthew 5 has affected me in a range of ways these past two months.  Sometimes it has been a slap in the face, sometimes a kick in the tail, sometimes a breath of fresh air.  The other thing is this blog entry. 
     Here's the thing.  God didn't send his Son for me to sleepwalk through life and go through the motions, claiming a faith that I don't demonstrate.  To me (not that I'm equating a blog to the Bible) they both spoke different aspects of the same thing.  Jesus speaks so plainly about what I need to do.  It's my attitude of self-preservation that makes it difficult.  Here's where the rubber meets the road.  You can't read Matthew 5 and walk away without making a decision.  Either Jesus meant what he said, or he didn't.  There's not really any other choice.  We (I) try to avoid the fact that it's that black and white, but what's the use?  Either his words are meant to apply to me, or they aren't.  It's tempting to pick and choose and feed on an ala carte Gospel - one that I feel satisfies my needs.  But who am I to tell Jesus what I need? 
     Does Jesus really mean that my anger looks the same in God's eyes as an actual homicide?  I must not think that, because I sure don't act like it.  But I can't say I believe the Bible and then conveniently ignore that part.  Or take verses 29 and 30.  It's the part where Jesus talks about poking out eyes and cutting off hands.  Our first impulse is to back away from this.  Clearly Jesus couldn't have meant it like that.  Does Jesus really want me to disfigure myself?  I think that's the wrong question.  The underlying question, the question implied by this offensive passage is this - How far am I willing to go?  What sacrifice would I make?  What price would I pay?  The first thing is that Jesus is speaking to every one of us.  The measuring stick is only "will I obey the call?"  Everything else is window dressing.  Either I accept the call of Jesus and follow him or I reject it and walk away.  This is an all or nothing proposition.
     The second thing, Steven Furtick's blog, challenged me to a different aspect of this same truth.  Why did Jesus climb a mountainside before he spoke a word?  Why did he give such a stark call once they all got there?  I think this hits it on the head.  Jesus doesn't have time for or interest in pretenders.  I know that grace covers all of our sins and his blood was shed for everyone, so I'm not trying to minimize what the power of God can do.  We are called to be more like Jesus every day.  Jesus was on this earth to lauch his Father's kingdom.  Not a program or an agenda.  He was establishing a kingdom.  He needs me to be genuine.  Not do I appear to be following, but am I really following?  Not do people around me see my obedience, but am I actually obeying?  Am I the genuine article or a cheap imitation?  It's the same question - how far am I willing to go?  What sacrifice would I make?  What price would I pay?  What do I sacrifice by trying to have my own way?
    
    

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The Truth

Everybody says they want the truth.  We hold up the truth as a perfect ideal.  I know in class one of the things I cannot stand is dishonesty.  I've been very clear with my kids about this.  They have been told, in no uncertain terms, that lying to me is #1 on the list of bad things that can happen in class.  I know plenty of other people who feel the same way.  I don't know if it's human nature or a social thing or something else.  We despise anything that isn't the truth.

Well, that's what we say.  The fact in many cases is this...we despise dishonesty in other people.  Most of us don't take the time to examine ourselves or have a trusted friend help us with that.  Our first lie is that we don't need it.  We love to sniff out other people's lies, but somehow our own escape detection.  The fact is that I am incredibly dishonest with myself.  I tell myself that my devotional/prayer time is sufficient, that seeing this or saying that won't affect me, that the thing I hear in church is a good idea but not a pressing concern, and a host of other lies anytime I am made to be uncomfortable.

The end result is that this affects what I believe.  Do I really believe the things that I say I do?  There's only one way to tell.  If I don't do it, then I don't believe it.  I can't count the number of times I've witnessed this truth in my students.  It's much easier to count the number of times I've admitted it in my own life.  Jesus' condemnation of the Pharisees didn't hinge on their results.  They would appear to us today to be model Christians.  He didn't criticize the appearance of their faith.  He told them that their heart on the inside didn't match their actions and words on the outside.  He called into question their motivation.  He was just as concerned, if not more concerned, about why they were praying, fasting and tithing as he was that these thing were actually happening.  Too often we use this as a "get out of jail free" card.  Since I will be judged on the motivation behind my actions, I can tell myself and anyone who challenges me that my motives are pure and God-centered.  That's the trump card.  You can't beat that.  Nobody can accurately judge my motives.  God alone is capable of that and He will do that.  If I really believe He'll judge my motives, I need to be honest with myself about what those motives are.

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Psychotic Break?

I've been reading over some of these posts and I've come to a realization.  I think I've been hitting myself in the head long enough.  Why would anyone read what I write and walk away feeling like being a Christian is something that they want to do.  Every post seems to end with some version of "and here's why I'm terrible at being a Christian."  I think that I'm done with that.  I am, probably for the first time in my life, getting my head around what grace is and why it matters.  I'm not going to say that I can go do whatever I want and it's all good.  I'm not going to pretend that the ideas of righteousness and holiness don't really apply because God knows my heart and understands.  I've had a faith crisis of sorts over the last few months and I feel like I'm on the other side of it now.  I can say that I am tragically and fundamentally flawed, but God's grace covers that.  As long as I am reaching for the cross, it will sustain me.  Jesus didn't come to earth and carry my sins so that I could wring my hands every day wondering how it's all going to work out.  What do I have need of?  I have a Savior and he works on my behalf.  Is there something more that I need that I'm missing?

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Practically Something

Do you ever have days that feel like you're sleepwalking? I have a lot of those lately. I think I'm suffering from discontent. Strangely enough, it's not about my life. I like my life. I have a good job, wonderful family, house to live in, money to pay all of the bills. It's a charmed life, really. So what's the problem? The problem is that I have this nagging feeling that there is something more. Jesus promised this fantastic life. He didn't give me a doctrine, or a 5 step plan or a presentation. What he gave me was hope. In fact, that's what he gave everyone. Not a program to join, but a kingdom to be part of. The promise of this kingdom is that I could have a full, vibrant life.
The reality is that all too often, I act too much like Jesus came to earth to meet my needs, make sure that my wants are satisfied. The truth is that on Sunday I act like a Christian and say and do all the things I'm supposed to. Would the people around me on Monday through Saturday say the same thing about me? Too many Christians are that in name only and would be more correctly called Practical Atheists or Practical Agnostics. Shouldn't what we say and do match what we say we believe? Is heaven really the home we're headed for? Some of us believe it like we believe in fairy tales. Others of us believe it because it makes us feel secure, like an insurance policy. Still others have this sense of obligation about it. We don't really feel any heavenward pull on our lives, but we know that we're supposed to so we just commit to it and numb ourselves to the fact that there is no life in our life.
Maybe the problem is that I like my life too much. To answer Jesus' call could mean that my life become about something other than the life that I'm attempting to create for myself. I'm beginning to understand more than I ever have Paul's comlaint in Romans. I know what I'm supposed to do and I want to do it, but not all of me does. Part of me does the very thing that the rest of me doesn't want to. Can anyone save me from me?
The answer is yes. This is the essence of the Gospel. The Gospel is good news. Here's the good news. There is someone who can save me from me. Someone who calls me to a greater life than the one that I could create for myself. What will we do? Will we trust him to do what he says or will we continue to hedge our bets and "believe" the Bible, just in case

Name Brand

You can't see it, but I had this whole big piece about the election and what I think and how it related to Christians and church. You'll have to trust me that it was an impressive piece of work. Just imagine all of the best things you've read and pretend I wrote those in there. I deleted the whole thing because it degenerated into nonsense.
Having said that, I spent a lot of time after the election thinking about what I'd seen and heard. Here's the thing that kind of stuck out to me. All throughout the campaign, there was an effort by both sides to "brand" themselves and the other candidates. Countless dollars were spent to hang labels on some people and remove labels placed there by others. It's no different than detergent, cereal or aluminum foil. Companies go to great lengths to attach labels to their own and their competition's products and then they brand by getting you to associate their name with a particular label, so that we view Bounty as durable and Quaker as healthy. In this case, parties tried to brand their people as insiders, outsiders, agents of change, savvy, patriotic, etc.

The only reason I mention this is because we, as Christians, have a brand as well. Additionally, people that disagree with us have taken great effort to attach other labels. We've been accomodating enough to allow the "Christian" label to mean a variety of things, ranging from compassionate to hateful. What is the Christian brand supposed to stand for? Put another way, how could a person recognize a Christian? It's not as much as I thought. According to 1 John, the ideal of the brand is that we should be full of truth, resistant to sin and guided by love. Would we use those 3 things to describe ourselves? If not, why wouldn't we? Equally as important is whether or not those around us would use those 3 things to describe us. If those are the things a Christian should show, why isn't it evident?

Sanctified?

I'm sitting in class on Wednesday night. As you might expect, the class centered on Satanism and related themes. It wouldn't be the week of Halloween without it. As we were talking about this, someone said something that floored me. Essentially, his point was this - these people that seem to be so diametrically opposed to what we believe have to go through a sanctification process like we do. As the words are being said, my first impulse was to bristle at the choice of words because it seems wrong to say that an active Satanist would be considered sanctified. He went on to explain that these people must wake up every morning, die to themselves and make an active choice to do all the requisiste things: dress appropriately, decide how to communicate their faith clearly and then act accordingly. That should sound pretty familiar. Here's the kicker...they do a better job of "sanctifying" themselves better than we do. There is usually very little ambiguity surrounding them.
I, by comparison, appear lukewarm and pliable. How can I be convinced that I'm right about what I believe and someone whose beliefs are the polar opposite of mine appears to be easily more committed than I am? Is the truth in me? Why do I say that? Is it because it's true or because it's convenient to believe? Is my faith clear to those around me or do I just say that I'm "living out my faith" because believing that relieves me of the responsibility to act out directly what I say that I believe.

Limping Along

I was reading something some time ago, and there was one sentence in particular that jumped out at me and really stuck with me. Paraphrasing, it said "revival will never come to our lives until our Christian walk becomes Jacob's limp" That has kept coming back to my mind over and over lately. I've spent time looking at that and what that really means. The more I read the account of Jacob wrestling with the angel, the more I realized I didn't know the story.

First, it's worth noting that the entire event never happens until Jacob is alone. Before he can encounter God, he is stripped of the stuff that surrounds him.
Second, the order of events is explains what happens better than I do. The angel does the whole touch the hip thing, then insists that Jacob let him go. So even though he was beaten, Jacob was still holding on. I don't know that he was even wrestling with the angel anymore as much as just holding on to him. His goal was no longer to overpower the angel because it was a useless endeavor at this point.
Third, the new name was not his blessing. The angel tells him he will be called Israel rather than Jacob. Then it says that he blessed him. We never know what the blessing is. From our point of view, the actual blessing is kind of irrelevant. The name is just a reflection of who he has become.

In our church, our pastor has been delivering a series of sermons that center on becoming a contagious Christian. He has mentioned on several occasions that you can only be contagious with something that you are already infected with. I think that's what Jacob's limp is about. When we struggle against God and finally come to the breaking point and realize that we are ultimately powerless against him, that his will is the only one that can be accomplished, then we can let go of the struggle and receive the blessing that is in store. I don't intend struggle to mean that we are at war with God, but until we engage Him we can never truly understand that we must approach on his terms. Yes, he accepts me as I am, but the blessing comes from his hand and at his discretion. This superficial Christian life that I've been living accomplishes almost nothing. I keep God at arms length, afraid to struggle and stopping short of what he has in store. I fear the limp, but my I'm not contagious until I limp away.

Followers

Are we followers of God? Do we even want to be? I was looking at the life of Elijah and some things struck me about how willing I am to follow God.
I don't know that I necessarily have a lot of Jonah moments when God says one thing and I willfully do the complete opposite. But I have a lot of moments when I don't do the opposite but I could do better. I tell myself that it isn't defiance, after all I didn't do what I wanted. I end up like the little boy in class who was told repeatedly to sit down. After being threatened with punishment, he sits down but adds "I'm still standing on the inside". I wonder what God has in store for me and when I'm honest the answer is not too much. Not because God is unable or doesn't love me, but because I'm a petulant child who just wants my way.
Look at Elijah by comparison. James 5 points out the Elijah was just a guy like the rest of us. He didn't have some kind of head start. What he had was obedience. He shows up on the scene, makes his way to Ahab and announces it won't rain until he says so. That's his prophetic debut. Clearly, great things are in store for him. He faces down a tyrant and comes away unscathed. This guy is on his way to prophet stardom. What does God tell him to do with his newfound celebrity? Go hide in the wilderness. After that, go live with a widow and her kid. How often does God do that - send us in the opposite direction of where we thought we were headed? In hindsight, we see that God had greater things in store for Elijah than he could imagine, but God had to prepare him. The key is that Elijah obeyed with no promise of a bright future. God's instructions to Elijah made no sense from our standpoint. But if we can't obey at the beginning, we won't make it to the end.
Are we willing to follow God no matter where it takes us? Will we follow even if the path leads to obscurity? It's easy to obey when we believe there is something better at the end. Oddly enough, God does make that promise, but it's not necessarily what I'm looking for. If I'll obey, God comes closer to me. For some reason, my life crowds out the value of that transaction. As if that somehow isn't the best deal going. What could be more valuable than that? It seems so easy, but here I stand on Mt. Carmel faltering between choices.

Hiatus

So, I'm officially back in the saddle. Sorry for the long absence. I don't have an actual good reason (unless you consider being a lazy slacker a good reason).
I was sitting in a church service and the text that used was from 1 Samuel 30. In it, David and his men are plundered by the Amelekites. What really jumped out at me was who did the plundering. If you go back to 1 Samuel 15, Saul was given the job of wiping out the Amelekites. Long story short, he doesn't do it. So all of David's trouble in this situation comes about because somebody else dropped the ball. The thing that really troubled me was this - how many people have suffered because I didn't see my task through. Now I feel pretty confident that there hasn't been a city burned to the ground because of my being spiritually lax, but the principle applies. I was really convicted by the weight of my decisions. Not that I'm important or crucial and people are watching to see what I do, but like it or not the life I live and the choices I make carry consequences outside of my own personal space. There is no concept of "this is my business, if only affects me" That was one of the reasons I started doing this in the first place...not to make sure people heard me but to make me accountable for what I do. I became lazy. Thank you to those of you who kept after me to post again. If I'm not posting, it's because I'm not studying like I should or I'm not disciplining myself to reflect on what I'm studying and how to apply it.
That was the thing about the Amelekites. Saul wasn't willing to see it through to the end and other people pay the price. If you read 1 Sam. 15, Samuel comes on the scene too. He's a different sort of guy altogether. When he discovers what Saul has done, he doesn't rebuke him and go about his business. He finds Agag, the Amelekite king, and kills him. He is completely willing to do what is necessary to see God's assignment done. I know for me, sometimes a spiritual victory is short-lived because my commitment to it was short-lived. When David faces Goliath, he could have felt pretty good about the outcome. Goliath is on the ground with a rock in his head. Rather than celebrate this victory, he's not finished. For David, the battle is not over until Goliath's head is separated from his body. There will be no round 2, no rematch. Just victory and a corpse. The same goes for Joshua. After God makes the sun stand still during a battle with the Amorites, Joshua finds the five kings leading the enemy hiding in a cave. Now these guys lost the battle, ran away and their army is destroyed. They are no longer a concern, right? Not in Joshua's book. He takes them out, has his commanders put their feet on the kings' necks and kills them. It's not a coincidence that David, Joshua and Samuel were such effective leaders and Saul was such a disappointment. The unwillingness to accept anything other than total victory over the enemy set them apart. I'm not saying Christians never face setbacks, but I am saying I create a lot of my own by not being committed to making sure the job is finished. How many Agags do I keep around for convenience of because of a lack of commitment. How many kings are hiding in caves because I didn't root them out. How many stunned giants get back up because I didn't finish the job when God provided my deliverance. And how many people are affected by what I've left undone.

Free at Last

Sorry for the extended hiatus. Baseball has ended so I get a large portion of my life back now. Let me reset with a survey question. What do you think is the most difficult aspect of Christianity? I hear a variety of them but I was curious what you guys thought about it.

Spiritual Switzerland

So here is a question. And I ask this without knowing for sure how I feel about it.
Is there such a thing as spiritual neutrality? I have essentially said publicly that no there isn't. I am pretty much on record as taking the position that everything we say and do either draws us toward God or pushes us away from Him. But I am wondering if this is a valid position. Is this an oversimplification or does this reflect the reality? Are we really going to say that going to a Lookouts game has spiritual weight? I understand my conduct there carries weight, but just going to the game? Any thoughts on this? I have one but I'll save it until I hear from you.

Bill of Rights

I was talking with a friend recently and the subject was along these lines. If you don't follow sports much, bear with me and I will make some sort of attempt at a relevant point eventually. John Amaechi, a former NBA player, announces in his autobiography that he is gay. In a related matter, Tim Hardaway, in an inteview that turned into an ESPN story , tells everybody that he hates gay people. (Ipromise that a point is on the way). Now the whole world is up in arms because Hardaway should be killed or beaten with clubs or some such thing. But this all takes a turn when people start to defend him. Here's my problem - the rationale used to defend Hardaway is many cases is essentially this -"nobody should be upset with him because he's just exercising his right to free speech". Now you could replace Hardaway with the Dixie Chicks or 100 other people and the argument is the same. I can't stand that argument because it's dumb on many levels. That's not how the 1st amendment works. It's freedom of speech, not freedom from repercussions, but far too many people don't understand that distinction and misuse what is rightfully theirs. This isn't an isolated incident. As a citizen it is your responsibility to be aware of your rights and how far they extend, a responsibility many people take lightly or completely ignore. What I'm wrestling with now is what does all this mean for me as a Christian? I have another citizenship, but what are the rights that accompany a citizen of heaven? To put it more bluntly, what can I count on God for? I don't mean that in a mean-spirited or sacreligious manner. I know I can count on my government to allow me to buy a gun, not go in my house without probable cause, allow me to vote, keep France from invading the country, etc. What are the guarantees of Christianity? Maybe instead of what can I count on God for I should say what can I expect from God? I know my earthly Bill of Rights, but what does my spiritual bill of rights look like? Or does God resist any effort to be defined like that? I wonder what you think.

By the Numbers

I was reading George Barna's latest book (which I recommend highly) and he was citing statistics that characterize the American church today. Check this out...

• 8 out of 10 believers do not feel they have entered the presence of God or experienced a genuine connection with him in their last worship service. 5 out of 10 extend that period to the past year.
• 1 out of every 6 believers have a relationship that provides spiritual accountability
• Fewer than 1 out of 10 believers give 10% of their income. (so a tithe of church members tithe)
• At any given time, a majority of believers do not have a specific person in mind for whose salvation they are praying.
• The typical churched believer will die without leading one person to a saving knowledge of Jesus.
• When asked how they want to be known, fewer than 1 in 10 believers mentions a description that reflects their relationship with God.

Let me sum up. There are 77 million people in this country that identify themselves as born again Christians. Of those 77 million, about 10-20% actually put it into practice on a regular basis. Why is the church becoming so irrelevant?

Please don't think that I'm saying "Why can't church people be more like me?" because nothing could be further from the truth. I think we could probably do better with fewer people like me, but that's probably a whole other post. I think I trend toward the majority. When you read this next part, you'll probably think "Aha! That's his problem" In light of what I've heard over the last couple of days, you'll think this next sentence is ridiculous so just read it quickly and move on. As I was watching The Sopranos, something was said that really speaks to this issue. Don't think I'm advocating watching Tony Soprano for spiritual guidance, I'm pretty sure it was one time deal. The gist is this...the wife is talking to the priest and she's confessing. She stops in mid-confession and tells the priest it's all a sham and her life is a lie. Then she starts over and her confession begins with "I've forsaken what is right for what is easy" Is it really just that simple and we try to couch it in spiritual terms? It's just easier to go through the motions than to be an actual disciple of Jesus. And we live in a society that is more than willing to grease the skids and let us slide along, not challenging our appearance of spirituality as long as we mind our business. I'm not blaming society for the way I am, I just saying that it's not in anybody's interest to make sure I'm genuine. So we go through our rituals and say and do all the right things and wonder what's happened. Would Jesus be affiliated with the Christians if he were on the scene today? Would we look like him at all? Or would Jesus look around and quote Isaiah 29:13 to us too? I'm pretty sure he would to me more often then I'd like to admit.
Prov 14:12, 16:25